Opportunity Gain
Cancer thriver, marketing whiz & twin mom Melissa Pappion reminds us to live big in the new year and beyond.
2020 was a crap year for most, and while Melissa Lear Pappion (Missy to me) would likely agree, you won’t find her complaining.
Not only was her toxic work environment making her sick with anxiety, she was diagnosed with stage 1 breast cancer and underwent a double mastectomy and reconstructive surgery. But thanks to her rock solid faith, family and friends, she kicked cancer’s butt and is taking the craziness of pandemic life and the hell that is homeschooling in stride.
Now with a clean bill of health, Missy’s starting 2021 with a new gig, new girls and a grateful, new lease on life.
Back Story
I first met Missy in 2010 while interviewing her for a digital marketing job at Spanx. She’d recently moved to Atlanta having left an agency role in Detroit and was warm, witty, and completely overqualified.
As someone with a perpetually scattered desk, mailbox and brain, I envied and came to rely on Missy’s ability to bring order to chaos. And while I always liked her, it was the day she brought me a Tupperware full of her mama’s seafood gumbo that I fell in love. And I will forever be in debt to her for helping me score tickets to what would be one of Tom Petty’s last shows and by far, the best concert I’ve ever experienced.
I would be lucky enough to spend six years making the world a better place, one butt at a time alongside her and have stayed in touch over the years since to swap recipes (mostly for cocktails), career advice and updates on life.
But don’t let her never-a-hair-out-of-place appearance or perfect pout fool you, this NOLA native has pluck, a word I love for its meaning of spirited and determined courage (which suits Missy to a T) and because it rhymes with, well, you know 😘.
Check out my interview with Missy to get her priceless perspective on the importance of framily, never settling and grabbing life by the lady balls!
Q&A
YOU ARE THE PROUD MOM OF TWO CHILD-MODEL GORGEOUS, 6-YR-OLD TWINS. WHAT HAS SURPRISED YOU MOST ABOUT MOTHERHOOD - BOTH THE JOURNEY TO BECOMING A MOM AND AS A MOM TO SKYLAR & BLAKE?
The Pappions L-R: Skylar, Melissa, Gregory & Blake; PHOTO by The Weithouse
Awww, thanks! I always wanted to be a mom but was surprised by the unconditional, one-of-a-kind love they give. It’s like a sip of ice cold water on a humid, New Orleans day - pure and unexpectedly refreshing. But as sweet as that sounds, I will add that twin life is not for the faint of heart. My husband Gregory and I have 6 sets of twins in our family, so we had a taste of what life had in store for us but definitely keep plenty of booze in our house and have a good system in place.
My road to becoming a mom wasn't easy. You spend your entire life trying NOT to get pregnant (sorry mom and dad) and when the times comes...nothing happens. I felt completely broken. My doctor and I tried EVERYTHING and still nothing.
She referred me to a reproductive specialist who immediately tried to sell me on IVF, but I wasn’t ready for that route. I saw another specialist, Dr. Desiree McCarthy-Keith, who was a Godsend. She was able to see me and diagnose me within the first 30 minutes of my appointment with PCOS (Polycystic Ovary Syndrome). Although my cycle was regular, my ovaries weren't releasing the eggs as they should. She ran some tests and told me she would help me get pregnant. One "trigger shot" later, and not only were my eggs released, I released 1 from each ovary...hence Skylar and Blake. They really are my miracle babies.
So many women have issues with fertility, and I want to tell them that they aren’t alone and to trust their instincts when it comes to their path to motherhood.
THE LAST TIME YOU AND I SPOKE, YOU WERE NAVIGATING A TOUGH WORK ENVIRONMENT, ONE THAT YOU ULTIMATELY DECIDED TO LEAVE. WHAT MADE IT SO BAD, AND WHAT DID YOU LEARN?
I started a new job with a Black hair consumer goods brand in January of 2019 and knew within the first few months that it wasn't the right culture for me. Amidst the growing momentum of the MeToo and Black Lives Matter movements and as Black woman, I thought if I joined a company of people who looked like me, I would feel like I belonged and like my voice and my mission mattered. It turned out that I was wrong, and that company was wrong for me.
I began doubting myself and my digital marketing skills. I developed anxiety and would vomit every morning when my boss called me. It took me 2 years, but I finally walked away from that toxic environment with the knowledge that despite how much we believe something should work, sometimes it doesn’t, and moving on isn’t a failure but a success because it means you’re not settling for less than you deserve.
TELL ME ABOUT YOUR NEW JOB. HOW DID THE OPPORTUNITY COME ABOUT, AND WHAT DREW YOU TO IT?
I'm Boehringer Ingelheim's Senior Associate Director, Digital Marketing, Pets. I'm working on a clever nickname since that's a LONG title. I'm on the Animal Health team and will be responsible for helping connect vets with pet owners through digital marketing. One of my good friends from NOLA put me in touch with his former coworker who had just moved to the Atlanta area and needed some marketing folks. After having a few conversations with them, I realized this was my next move.
I began my career at Newell Rubbermaid and returned to the company after Spanx, and one of the things I loved about my time there was the autonomy I had to build programs and teams I could nurture. I saw similar opportunities with Boehringer Ingelheim.
It’s a smart, progressive company, and who doesn’t want to work with pets? I’d take animals over humans any day!
Missy’s 1st baby, Teacup Yorkie Gumbo Ya Ya
YOU FACED AND BEAT BREAST CANCER LAST YEAR. WHAT DID THE EXPERIENCE TEACH YOU ABOUT YOURSELF, AND HOW DID IT CHANGE YOU?
FUCK CANCER…can I say that? FUCK CANCER! I was diagnosed with stage 1 breast cancer on February 6th, 2020. I'm the daughter of a breast cancer survivor, so I started getting mammograms at 35. This lump was detected through a routine mammogram, but I caught it super early. Cancer changed me and the lens I see life through.
I will never forget the 1st thing my plastic surgeon said to me when he walked in the room,
"This cancer will not kill you."
I felt like God was telling me to live. He was giving me a second chance to really live. So I promise to spend the next 40+ years living life to the fullest.
Buy the shoes, eat the fries, take the trip. DO IT BIG!
Team Pappion beach selfie via IG
My friend in Detroit told me you can't kill bad grass, and boy was he right. It also taught me that nothing else really matters except my family. We tend to sweat the small stuff, but at the end of the day, it's minor. I also say "I love you" more. I tell my girlfriends, my cousins and anyone who matters to me. I had a great support system during my journey, and I appreciate everyone for being there for me!
NOT ONLY DID YOU BEAT CANCER, YOU DID IT IN THE DAYS OF COVID-19. HOW DID THAT COMPLICATE MATTERS, AND WHAT ADVICE DO YOU HAVE FOR WOMEN GOING THROUGH A HEALTH CRISIS DURING A PANDEMIC?
Cancer, COVID and homeschooling almost took me out! I ended up having a double mastectomy on March 10, 2020, right before COVID really hit. The twins school shut down for a little while so we kept them at home with us. This is why I was making margaritas at 10AM :-) My mom stayed with us for 6 months while I recovered. Gregory’s mom also came to Atlanta to help us. It definitely takes a village.
My friend Lauren was sweet enough to create a meal train for me, and it was beyond helpful. I'm never one to ask for help, but I was happy she stepped in! I can honestly say that my Spanx and Oxford Academy framily (yep, y'all aren't just my friends) were my biggest supporters, and I will forever be grateful to y'all. I had to go to Emory every two weeks after my surgery for painful tissue expansion, and I had to go alone, masked up. Gregory wasn't even allowed in the hospital, and with each surgery, I had to get a Covid-19 test. I’ll tell you, I hope I never have my brains touched through my nose ever again, and I’ll never look at Q-tips the same. Fast forward to August, and I finally received my implants!
Ladies, if you have a health crisis during this pandemic, get your girl gang in place and take whatever help they're willing to give you. Make life easier for yourself, and make sure your hubby steps up to cover all bases while you're recovering. We're resilient creatures, this too shall pass.
HAVING WORKED WITH YOU AND KNOWING YOU, I WOULD CONSIDER YOU AN OVERACHIEVER, AND DARE I SAY IT, PERFECTIONIST. YOUR KIDS' V-DAY CARDS AND B-DAYS BLOW ME AWAY EVERY YEAR. WOULD YOU AGREE WITH MY ASSESSMENT? IF NOT, SKIP THIS QUESTION 😂. IF SO, HOW DO YOU DO IT?
Missy, seen here with her family, didn’t let Covid keep her from throwing a Halloween, birthday party mashup for her kids.
HAHAHA...me an overachiever/perfectionist? Nah! I put a lot of time and love into making memories for Skylar and Blake. They are our first and last babies, so I go all out. It helps to be super organized and plan in advance. I normally pick a theme for their October 29th birthday in August. And by no means is this my way of Mom-shaming the mothers who buy store-made cards and keep things simple. I’m a big believer that moms should try hard not to compare ourselves to each other. I do big parties because the kids get so excited, and it makes my soul sing.
ONE OF THE MANY THINGS I'VE LONG ADMIRED ABOUT YOU IS YOUR RELATIONSHIP WITH YOUR FAMILY AND FRIENDS, SPECIFICALLY YOUR OLDER SISTER WHO SEEMS TO BE ONE OF YOUR BEST FRIENDS. CAN YOU SHARE A LITTLE BIT ABOUT THE ROLE THEY PLAY IN SUPPORTING YOU, PARTICULARLY THIS PAST YEAR?
Missy with her best big sis Jennifer.
Jennifer is my best sister...she's my only sister 🤣. We're 8 years apart, and yes I was an oops. Although I'm the younger one, I act like I'm the oldest and am very protective of her. She's an amazing "Tauntie" to the twins and always has my back no matter what. When I first stepped foot on Xavier University of Louisiana's campus, I was immediately identified as "Jennifer Lear's little sister." That irritated me so much then, but I'm proud to be her little sister. Over the Christmas break we got matching tattoos of the mathematical symbol for congruence which means the same but different and are now permanently bonded for life.
I’m lucky to have a special group of friends I met when I lived in Detroit for 10 years. Some happen to be my Alpha Kappa Alpha sorority sisters and others are people I met along the way. I'm a loyal friend, and I take friendship very seriously. When I moved to Detroit, I knew no one except my sister. These people welcomed me with open arms, and I still remain close with them to this very day. I normally make a trip to Detroit every Opening Day but COVID took that away from me. I can't wait to love on my friends again!
YOU AND YOUR HUBBY GREGORY HAVE BEEN MARRIED 9 YEARS (RIGHT?!?) WEREN'T Y'ALL HIGH SCHOOL SWEETHEARTS, OR DID I MAKE THAT UP? ANY SECRETS TO YOUR RELATIONSHIP SUCCESS?
Yes and yes! I met Gregory in 2nd grade and couldn't stand him. He was the class clown, and I was the teacher's pet. Fast forward to high school when I realized he was cute. We dated on and off from high school until after college and got married October 1, 2011. After 9 years of marriage, I can honestly say that it's not an easy road. Marriage is work! The best advice I can give is to never stop dating each other, show each other how much you appreciate them, put each other first (before the kids and other family members) and celebrate each other’s success. Sounds simple enough, but we get so caught up in the day-to-day, we forget the basics.
Missy with her AKA sisters on her wedding day.
FAVORITE SONG TO DANCE TO AND FAVORITE TO CRY TO?
If you ever want to see me clear a dance floor, play "Push It" by Salt-N-Peppa. And yes, I know all the moves from the video. My favorite song to cry to is "His Eye Is On The Sparrow." It reminds me of my Granny Irma, and I miss her so much.
FAVORITE QUOTE OR WORDS TO LIVE BY?
"I'd rather regret the things I've done than regret the things I haven't done." - Lucille Ball
WHO IS A MOONLIT MAMA YOU ADMIRE AND WHY?
Definitely my friend Dr. Alanna Morris. Not only is she one of the smartest women I know (she's a cardiologist), she's a single Mom to 2 adorable little girls and a fur baby Lea. Watching her navigate motherhood has been nothing but fun, and I love how she always gives you her authentic self.
Missy’s picks for quick, easy ways to pamper yourself from head-to-toe, inside and out…
